“I’ve said it ten times now, and it’s still there.” Almost every manager knows that feeling. In the warehouse, it involves pallets left standing; in the sales team, a CRM that no one updates. In internal services, it involves handovers that are only partially completed, and in the office, time sheets that consistently arrive late. Many managers have advanced because they are highly skilled in their field and have mastered leadership through practice. As a result, much goes well. However, they often get stuck on one point: agreements that people fail to follow through on, no matter how often they are repeated.
Why does repeating an assignment work so poorly?
Repeating yourself works poorly because the cause usually lies elsewhere than the manager thinks. Anyone who says something for the tenth time assumes that the employee does not want it. In practice, very different reasons are often at play:
- No time has been scheduled for it, causing it to always be the first thing to fall by the wayside;
- it is unclear who should do it;
- the manager and the employee understand something different by it, such as with “tidyed up”, “updated” or “handed over”;
- something practical is missing, such as a fixed place, access to a system, or a clear format;
- No one notices when it is done right.
As long as that cause remains out of sight, the tenth request changes little. Each repetition does make the tone sharper, however. The employee hears less and less of the content and more and more of the irritation, and does just enough to avoid trouble.
Why does a directive style get stuck?
A directive style works well for safety, with new employees, and when speed is of the essence. It grinds to a halt as soon as you want people to continue doing things of their own accord. Motivation research consistently shows that people only feel truly responsible for a task when they have influence over it, feel capable of doing it, and have a good relationship with their supervisor. An order from above yields obedience at best, and that disappears as soon as the supervisor is not present.
What managers call “ownership” is very concrete in practice. An employee sees for themselves that something is being left undone, picks it up without being asked, and speaks up if, for whatever reason, it is not working out. This behavior emerges more quickly when people have contributed to the agreement. You execute an agreement you devised yourself better than a rule imposed on you.
What works?
What works is a short and concrete conversation in which the manager asks first and only then makes an appointment. Take a sales team where the CRM is constantly lagging behind. The usual phrase is: “I’ve already said ten times that the CRM needs to be updated.” A conversation that yields better results sounds like this:
- Name what you see. I see that this week's visit reports are not yet in the system.
- Ask for the cause. “What makes that get left undone?”
- Let the employee contribute ideas. What is needed to update it within a day of a visit?
- Make a concrete appointment. Document who does what, when, and what it looks like when it is finished.
- I'll get back to you. “I’ll take a look with you on Friday.” Also mention it when things are going well.
The same conversation works in the warehouse, in internal sales, and in the office. It takes five minutes and requires no form. The manager maintains control, and the employee has an agreement they helped create themselves.
What is a collaboration conversation?
A collaboration conversation is a fixed, short discussion between a manager and an employee about how they work together, separate from performance reviews or salary. Anja developed this conversation for an organization where performance and appraisal interviews primarily caused tension. Employees associated those conversations with criticism. The collaboration conversation is about two sides: what the employee needs from their manager, and vice versa. A simple structure:
- What is going well in the work and collaboration?
- What are you running into?
- What do you need from me?
- What do I need from you?
- What do we agree on, and when do we review?
Because the conversation recurs regularly, minor annoyances are discussed before they escalate. Managers notice that employees come up with solutions more often themselves. Agreements that have been left unresolved are addressed long before anyone raises the issue for the tenth time.
Why does leadership theory often fail to translate into practice?
Leadership theory lands poorly when it is detached from the daily reality of the manager. A team leader with a packed schedule, a customer on the line, and an employee who is constantly late has little use for models with four quadrants and English terms. He wants to know what to say to that employee tomorrow, or to the experienced colleague who knows everything better. Anja learned this herself early on. When she approached a group of managers with theory, she was told: “I don’t know what you’re talking about, but that’s not how it works with us.”
What does catch on has three characteristics:
- Personal situations. Participants bring their own difficult conversations and recurring problems.
- Concrete sentences. They are given words they can use tomorrow, in their own language.
- Practice a lot. The conversation is re-enacted, preferably on camera, so that they hear how they come across.
Language varies depending on the environment. A supervisor in a distribution center needs different examples and words than a sales manager or a department head in an office. That is why Anja speaks with participants and their managers beforehand. This way, she knows which situations are at play, and participants recognize their own work from the very first practice session.
What can an organization do?
An organization helps its leaders the most by giving them time, tools, and support for the human side of their work. In concrete terms, that means:
- recognize that leadership is a profession, in addition to the craftsmanship for which one has advanced;
- Make room in the schedule for short conversations with employees;
- agree on when HR will get involved, and what steps have been taken in that regard;
- Ask in your own meetings with supervisors which agreements are going well and why, and not just what is going wrong;
- As a manager, lead by example: ask a question before giving an order.
Managers supported in this way experience fewer escalations to HR. They receive more agreements that are adhered to without repetition, and teams that proactively contribute ideas on how the work can be improved.
How do you handle this with your own managers?
Do you recognize this pattern in your own organization? Anja van der Wurff trains managers in production, logistics, sales, and office settings in the conversations that make agreements work. Prior to the training, she speaks with the participants and their managers. This allows the group to work with situations from their own work: the appointment that keeps getting postponed, the experienced colleague who goes their own way, the conversation that has been put off for weeks. Participants practice the short question-and-answer session and the collaborative conversation, and go home with sentences they can use the very next day.
Would you like to know what this could mean for your managers? Schedule a no-obligation introductory meeting immediately.
